Bye Bitch

Beyonce Bye GIF from Byebitch GIFs

As my father used to say "don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out!"  That pretty much sums up how I feel about 2017.

But let's not dwell on the past twelve months of hospitals, doctors, and Chemo-Poison infusions.  Because that, my friends, is in the past!!!

Ringing the bell on my way out of the clinic - this time its really the last time!

I'm starting 2018 with every reason to believe I am cancer free.  (There's apparently no way to really tell, but I'm just gonna go with the "cancer free" thing.)   There are still a couple of other medical things that I'll have to do in the New Year, but none of them involve poison.  #winning

Every single doctor appointment, every surgery, every chemo appointment, every trip to the ER, and all of the late night "fuck this; just fuck this shit" meltdowns, he was there by my side.  

 To love; to being alive; to perseverance; to new adventures; to justice; to furry companions; and to health!  Happy New Year!

It's Been a Blur

Since the last post, I finished the "big trial", and am thrilled to report that we got a fantastic result!!  Going into it, I honestly didn't know if my body would hold up 'til the end, but thanks to a creative combination of GNC supplements, caffeine consumption, KIND bars, and support from Doug, I made it.  Then, within minutes of the verdict, I found out I needed to immediately escort my client to a remote location in another state, to protect him from all the lunatics who announced to the Twitterverse that they were going to kill him.  So much for my much needed post-trial slumber (although it did keep me from indulging in post-trial celebrating, which probably wouldn't have been good for me either)!  

Once I returned to Ft. Bragg 2 days later, I crashed hard.  We were supposed to take a leisurely drive back to Texas, filled with hiking and breweries, but instead, I slept in the RV for 5 days straight.  We still managed to do a small hike and hit a brewery near Asheville, so all was not lost!

Pisgah National Forest in the Smoky Mountains

Boojum Brewery in NC.  What's a "Boojum" you ask?  Google it ... really.

Can dogs get drunk just by watching their humans drink beer? Perhaps.

We made it back to Texas just in time for the docs to pump me full of more ChemoPoison, and man, was that one tough.  The only thing I remember from the rest of November is sleeping, barfing, and wandering around in an incoherent fog of chemobrain.  Oh yeah, and there was that one totally useless trip to the ER when I was convinced I might actually be dying, but all they did was run some tests and tell me I was just full of poison. 

Damn doctors are trying to KILL me!!

Now, all of a sudden, its December again.  You know, that "wonderful time of year" when Corporate America brainwashes all of us into spending a bunch of money we don't have on gifts that nobody really needs,  presumably in celebration of a holiday that has absolutely nothing to do with giving anybody gifts.  #Resist 😏

Instead of gifts, we traveled to NJ to spend time with my mom.  We got to walk on the beach and visit a new brewery with an old grad-school friend.  We also ate way too many bagels, drank too much wine, and told funny stories about my father until we cried.  That, my friends, is the real holiday spirit. 

Jersey Shore

Backward Flag Brewing Company in Forked River, NJ

Finally, I am happy to report that I only have ONE chemo treatment left - on 28 December!  Because of the holiday, the nurse tried to push it into January.  OH HELL NO!!!!  Listen lady, I've already made a New Year's Resolution to avoid ingesting poison in 2018, so you're just going to have to squeeze me in this year.  With that light at the end of the tunnel, I can definitely get through the next month!

Ho. HO. HO y'all. 
via GIPHY