Musings from the Middle of the Night

Sleep is a funny thing.  I can doze off mid-sentence in the middle of the day, but some nights, all cuddled under fuzzy blankets and puppies, I just stare at the dark ceiling.  What better time to blog?

Here are a few things I've learned this week.

1.  The nicer you are to everyone, the better your life is.  (just call me Captain Obvious).  Spending so much time in the hospital has really brought this front and center.  The nurses and doctors deal with sad people all day long.  Its pretty easy to make them laugh, or smile by giving a small compliment, or just tell them you appreciate them.  The way they light up when you do that makes you light up, too.  (Hey Dad, I guess you really weren't just flirting with those nurses all those years - you were actually on to something!!  Thanks for teaching me how to handle this journey with laughter and kindness.  I miss you!) 

2.  When eyelashes fall out, they don't fall straight down.  They ALWAYS fall into your eyeball.  Every time. 

3.  There's a hierarchy for military medical care.  Active Duty in Uniform are at the top of the heap.  Then Active Duty not in uniform, then dependents, then retirees.  Being in a higher category gets you appointments faster, cuts down on the line at the pharmacy, and sometimes improves the way you're generally treated.  This week, I discovered a new category - a Platinum Executive Level, so to speak.  Active Duty in Uniform and Bald.  I'm freaking royalty now. 

4.  Women in general are amazing.  Complete strangers on the street tell me I look beautiful.  Female employees and neighbors at the campground stop to ask how I'm feeling, every single day.  The other day, another bald woman in the grocery store put her arm around me and asked how I was doing (we then discussed which flavor of herbal tea best disguises the ever present chemo-funk taste.)  There's even gender bias from the dogs.  Sunday (female) is my shadow, my snuggler, my constant companion - she runs to the bathroom with me, curls up at my head when I'm napping, and is just generally nurturing.  Finn (male) runs around squeaking his toy and licking his nether-regions.  

5.  Nose hairs actually serve a purpose (other than to tell you when its in the single-digits during a New England Winter).  They catch snot.  Seriously.  Now that I don't have nose hairs, my nose runs ALL THE TIME.  Oh, and sometimes it bleeds, free-flow, without any little nose hairs to stop it.  (Which was amazing fun in the checkout line of the grocery store the other day ...... "clean up on aisle four!!!")

6.  My timing of this cancer thing was impeccable.  If I was healthy right now, I'd be spending all of my time and money on flying around the country to protest marches and volunteering with the ACLU, HRC, Innocence Project, Planned Parenthood, etc., and probably getting disciplined by the Army for doing so.  So its good that there's something holding me back.  (Oh, but just you wait, world.)

That's it for now.  I'll leave you with this adorable picture of how I woke up from my nap yesterday.  

Snuggler in Chief, Sunday